Damn, its time for True Confessions week
August 17, 2009
I didn’t tell you this when it happened a few weeks ago. I was in shock, trying to adapt. I was scrambling, I was numb. I decided I was invincible, it couldn’t happen to ME. But it did. And the stares, and the whispers.The fake sympathy, the transparent, crushing RELIEF that is wasn’t Them this time, it was Her.
Yes, my hours were cut at my job.
and two weeks later, just this last week, they were cut again.
I’m now down 40% of my income. Just. like. that.
I know some of my readers have been feeling this both around their peripheries, as well as close to their lives. For some , it has devastated. For some, its brought a new dawn into the realm of dreams and second chances at what they Really want to be doing. I’m breaking about a hundred of my own personal rules even talking about my F**ing job here, but the truth is…
I HATE it. I am so good at it, I’m ridiculously overqualified, and no one there can even summon a peapod of acceptance for my lifestyle. They belittle me. They leave me out of mention when introducing staff. They change my job title at introductions to a lower skillgrade. They way overstep their bounds, and try and tell me how to run my personal life so its more in line with Christ.
So I would say that while I do feel some of the devastation/panic, I also feel some of the soft dawning sun. I’m really good at SO many things. I’ve done retail, I’ve done warehouse work. I’ve worked as a cigarette and candy girl in the bars of San Francisco. I worked for 7 YEARS in Lighting Design. I’ve done office work, and lately, I’m turning my hand to Personal Home Organization. I have been helping friends for years on such things, and recently, a good friend paid me to come over and completely organize the piles in one room, re-decorate, and move furniture around. It was so much fun! messy,tiring, physical, and all Mine. It was totally different from what I do now, and I had a blast!
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So now I’m looking at doing part time personal home organization. Let me know if you want to talk about this more.
Back to the reduction, and our confession. If you are feeling panicked from your own situation, please allow me just a small encouragement about two things-
#1)It is perfectly okay for you to feel grief and despair about whatever you are experiencing. But as you process through that, go into abundance. Flower up. (It’s like “Manning up.”) Make a tunnel for all that opportunity to come pouring down into your life. State, OUT LOUD, the needs the universe will meet, are meeting, can now meet. Frame this in such a way, that they already exist. “I am in perfect health.” “I am healthy, happy and whole.”
“I have found the right fit of a job, close to home, that pays well, acknowledges my strengths, and challenges me.”
2)DO. ACT. NETWORK. SPEAK your dreams out loud, tell the guy at the bar about your talents. Don’t be afraid to take a different trail than the one that looks like it leads to the top. The top will give you nosebleeds, if you try and scamper up there too fast.
I try and bear these things in mind as I process the withering looks, the pity in the eyes of the strangers I work with.Screw them. I’m shining on, like a crazy diamond.
Photo credit to-
http://techepics.com/files/swiss-army-everything.jpg
http://www.dancingmood.net/musicaloccupation/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/fist.
Drops in the Pail on Tue, 18th Aug 2009 7:22 am
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